Coronavirus diaries: Amelia part 2!

Hey guys! It has been nearly a year since I first wrote a coronavirus diary so I thought it was about time that I revisited it again since we are back in another lockdown which is not dissimilar to the original lockdown. I am in a completely different place now as I am in the middle of year 12 and I am expected to do online school until March at least. Everything just feels like a big mess. But at least this time, the end is in sight because we have a vaccine to hopefully save us from coronavirus. I am planning on potentially releasing some more coronavirus diaries over the next few weeks along with my regular content which is super exciting because I love this series! For now, here is part 2 of my coronavirus diary.

Picture the scene. It’s nearly 8 o’clock on Monday evening. I’ve just finished on facetime with my friends from Church and Boris is about to make an announcement to the nation. I can’t bring myself to watch it so I decide to watch ‘Into the Woods’ instead. I’ll find out the announcement from my parents later.

That was my first mistake. Nothing can be worse than seeing the disappointment in my mum’s eyes full on as she tells me that the nation is going into another lockdown for at least 6 weeks and that schools are shutting. It’s that familiar sinking feeling in my stomach that resurfaces once again and to match that, I sink down into the living room floor, trying to process it. I decide to finish watching ‘Into the Woods’ instead of thinking about it too deeply. Escapism will be my armour for now.

It’s only once I’ve finished what is a very good film that the reality of the situation hits me. No school, friends or freedom for at least 6 weeks. I feel strange deja vu like we’re back into March 2020 all over again except without the warmer weather. I finish the night off by trying to get to sleep but instead lying awake for a very long time.

The next few weeks are a roller coaster of emotions. Sometimes I feel thankful and appreciative of all the good things in my life like my friends, family and the things I’m passionate about. Other times I feel so low and overthinking manipulates my thoughts and my mood, turning me into a wreck of sadness and anger. I alternate between hope and hopelessness as much as I change my clothes. But I know that I am not alone and that this is most people’s lockdown story. I’ve tried to make the conscious effort this lockdown to be more authentic about my mental health instead of trying to make it look like I’m holding it all together fine. I don’t struggle every day but I don’t always have good days and that’s okay. It’s okay not to always be okay.

To be honest, I’ve spent much of my time in lockdown completing school work and my minimal free time has been spent keeping in touch with friends, going on walks and playing chess with my mum. It’s a good distraction to be honest because my boredom and lack of focus in the first lockdown was scarily real. Even after the third lockdown I think we are all yet again reminded of what truly matters in life and we hope that we can return to normal life soon. For now, we wait patiently for the vaccine to defeat the virus once and for all.

A walk with my best friend!
My chess set!
When the rest of the country got snow, Hull just got frost

Thank you for reading this post! There’ll be another one out soon but until then bye for now!

Amelia Grace a.k.a Amelia in Hull

12 comments

  1. I think this third lockdown has definitely gotten to a lot of people more than the other two lockdowns, especially as it is during winter when it is cold and there is limited time during the day when it is light outside. Everybody is getting restless and wanting things to return to normal but we have to remember that this is the final stretch – once enough people have been vaccinated, everything will return to normal and in a few years, this will be nothing but a memory (hopefully!). Keep thinking positive thoughts and try to keep yourself busy as much as possible. I love that you are playing chess with your Mum – have you seen The Queen’s Gambit on Netflix yet? Maybe you can learn some moves from her! My messages are always open on Instagram if you need to talk. xx

    Liked by 2 people

    • Yes I think that is the exact reason why it has been hard especially in January. In light of the news we received on Monday we can have hope that things can finally return to normal soon! Chess has been such a fun thing to do and I really love it. I’ve just binged the Queens Gambit and I loved it. Not gonna lie Thomas Brodie Sangster being in it made it pretty amazing even without the storyline πŸ˜‚ thank you so much same applies xx

      Liked by 1 person

  2. This lockdown really has felt different to the others, I think we have all got to the point where we are so fed up and struggling to see the light at the end of the tunnel. The sooner we all get this vaccine the better! Thank you for sharing, hopefully soon the world will return to some normality xxx

    Liked by 1 person

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